The DAT Experience: My First Call
  

When the call came in, it was for a “hot” fire, meaning the home was still in flames and firefighters were on the scene. There was one disaster volunteer lined up, but another one was needed. They picked me – my first call.

Ed (an experienced volunteer) and I (a newbie) headed to the home, only to be called off because the family had been moved to the hospital. We went back to the office, picked up another experienced volunteer named Donna and went to the emergency department.

When we arrived, we met with the Trauma Intervention Team who filled us in on the status of the family members. Sadly, there had been one death in the fire and two people were injured. The family hadn’t yet been notified of the death, so we had to be very sensitive about questions and conversation.

It turned out to be a multi-generational family of nine. We supported a young woman who was in the waiting room with three children. The woman was wearing her nightshirt and her mother’s shoes, which were all she could grab. The baby was wearing a t-shirt with a flannel blanket wrapped around his bottom – no diaper. The other children had been on their way to school and were called back to devastation. I tried to stay out of the way and listen until I figured out what I could contribute.

We had to wait until the heads of the household arrived. Dad arrived with another child who had seen how upset his father was and knew that very bad things had happened. The child was left with us while Dad went in to visit the injured.

The poor little guy was very upset and kept trying to get to his dad. I went over to sit by the door to help the older boy keep him inside the room and started reading a children’s book. It took a while, but he opened up a bit and started playing.

After a little while, the kids started to get a bit crabby (they had been very well behaved) and I asked if the baby had any breakfast – to which the answer was no. We were able to get diapers, milk and food from the hospital for the kids and the young woman. We took the kids out into the garden to run off some energy and break away from the walls and the stress in the waiting room.

I had the opportunity to talk a bit with the children while we were in the garden. The oldest would point to a flower and talk about where theirs had been planted, with the conclusion of each description ending in, “but they aren’t there anymore. They burned up.” We talked a little bit about perennials and renewal. I was able to tell both of them that they had a lot to be proud of, and that they were good young men.

After Mom arrived, another young woman and baby who had been injured were released, wearing only paper clothing…no shoes. Their hair was badly singed and they had suffered from smoke inhalation and minor burns.

Once they sat down, it became clear to the woman that there had been a death. A young man didn’t get out of the upstairs room where they had been sleeping. The tears were hard to take.

We were able to get them into a nearby motel for the weekend; they had their own transportation. We also explained what we could do for them and started the paperwork for financial assistance towards food, clothing and other basic supplies. Dad’s eyes lit up when he saw the amount to go on the client assistance card. For a large family, it can amount to a large amount of money. Donna also counseled Mom, who was at the disbelieving stage. Donna told her that the feelings would come in waves and not to fight them.

Through all of this, Ed maintained a quietly competent presence, made phone calls, organized paperwork and showed me how the forms work and why. He made it possible to spend the time calming the kids and offering hugs to the adults.

In the end, I learned that victims may need ‘permission’ to allow the feelings in, and advising them to accept the wave as it comes, and then to let it go could give them the latitude to feel when they are numb from shock.

Victims may also need ‘direction’ to start getting back to some semblance of normal. This family was advised to go to their motel rooms, clean up, feed the kids and get them clothed. Then they may have a better start at thinking about what they need to do next.

This was a complicated call and my mind is still a bit boggled in some ways. In retrospect, the people issues were delicate, devastating and profoundly painful, but from my point of view it was a very fulfilling experience. I learned long ago to avoid internalizing other people’s emotions in stressful situations, but I will remember those kids for the rest of my life.